This afternoon I will be leaving for the mountains to see K. I still don’t know if this a brilliant or the worst idea I ever had.

K by the way sent a text last Thursday (which I read Friday morning) telling me that he was thinking about me. Already this happening made me realize how different our affair is this time to whatever we had four years ago. Then a text with a wording like this would never have happened. Now to make matters worse (or even better depending on how you look at it) I got an email from him that same Friday in which he explained in detail how much time he has, how he wants to spoil me and despoil me (that in not so graphic detail but leaving room for thought) and how I can spend my time while he works. And to make matters totally complicated and bring my feelings into a complete turmoil, he called Sunday night! I saw his missed call shortly before I went to my gym class and then later tried to call him back. But all the while during the class I thought about what he wanted, imagining all kinds of scenarios like him cancelling etc. And you know what he wanted when he called back? He just wanted to know how I was doing…

I cannot believe this is happening. Everything is different and he is just a lot nicer than I am used to. So I will try to relax and have no expectations. Still don’t know how to do this but will do my best this weekend. Also packed two books, just in case.

I have as well some online dating news. I am now in touch with F. He is not my usual kind of guy, he is a lot smaller than I like them and also a bit older than me. But he also still has a full set of hair (at least on his picture), and everything else about him just fits with what I want in a man. On the phone he is funny, attentive and has the right kind of accent.
Regarding accent: Do you have that in English too? That when you listen to someone’s voice you know exactly where he is coming from? What kind of background, education and ‘class’ he is coming from? And quite often when I talk to someone, it ends right there on the phone because I just know that we don’t match. OMG, I am really superficial…

Anyway, let’s get back to F. He already asked me out on our first phone call. He wants to go for dinner at a nice place. Let’s see what he means by that. We had already agreed on day, but I told him I would love to talk to him before that because it’s only next Wednesday and it’s always kind of weird when you have a date in 10 days and then don’t talk to the other person again. Since he had to travel outside of the country and I am going skiing this weekend, we agreed on next week. He really sent another email, asking me when I would be home to talk to him and then on Wednesday this week he called and we talked for about 2 hours. Not too bad.

I am starting now to get a bit nervous about my weekend with K (am leaving in less than 5 hours). Will keep you posted about everything.